splitbrain.org

electronic brain surgery since 2001

My Brain Sucks (sometimes)

Content Warning: Mental Health


This blog is usually not deeply personal. It's more like a series of humble brags on finished projects and such.

However this only shows one side of myself. The side when I actually get shit done.

These are the good times. Unfortunately there are bad times. Times I feel weak, anxious and like I could just cry. A diffuse feeling of dread and the inability to get anything done.

Vitamin D and getting enough sleep helps. Quitting the news and stop reading Twitter also helped somewhat. But sometimes the bad times hit me anyway.

I shy away from calling it depression, because I know that many have it worse. I still can get up. I still can do my job and be reasonably good at it. I just feel like shit for no tangible reason.

My wife thinks I should try therapy, but I am not really sure what to talk about. I'd rather have some pills that unfuck my brain chemistry. But from what I hear, finding the right medication is a difficult and long term process. And that does not sound appealing at all…

Anyway, I'm not really sure what the point of this post is. I just thought this side of me should be on my blog, too.

I will go out today and see some friends I haven't seen in a long time. I will pretend to be a happy being and if I'm lucky it will convince my brain to agree.

Tags:
mentalhealth, depression